Oh the threesome. Who hasn’t thought this could be among the highlights of one’s youthful (or not so youthful) sexual misadventures. And what fun it is to watch a trio of consenting adults dip their toes into orgy waters. And the title deed was not unsatisfying. The participants, Olivia, Connor and Jenny (Zoey Deutch, Jonah Hauer-King and Ruby Cruz) have what could have been a sexy one-nighter to look back upon with whatever it is one feels after such an encounter. Of course, life and movies don’t work that way and the three prove to be too irresponsible and unlucky for a tidy love affair. You see, Connor is in love with Olivia, and like I imagine any hot-blooded man with a crush, concedes to the impromptu threesome at her behest. Rando Jenny is also up for it and so we have the makings for a modern love story with modern complications and modern temperaments. Though not unwatchable (it’s well-acted, however the soundtrack is altogether too loud and too leading), it suffers from ancient and very unprogressive script and character decisions. For what started off as a unique, messy yet believable love story, quickly devolves into a narrative driven by coincidences and one of my all-time biggest movie pet-peeves and what I think of as The Secret of My Success effect. For those of you who are too young or haven’t yet seen or heard of the 1987 Michael J. Fox film, The Secret of My Success is a movie about an ambitious mailroom employee who lies and finagles his way into an executive position before he’s inevitably and publicly uncovered. It is an example of “the big lie” trope, with its main character sweatin’ to keep his or her tall tale under wraps for our entertainment. Sure, people bend or omit the truth and get exposed and for Fox it was charming and the film was saying something about the impossibility of climbing the corporate ladder sans nepotism. Here the big lie is an obvious plot device ringing infantile, especially since the movie was succeeding at being rational and coherent. The triangle and its ongoing entanglements was drama enough and Olivia (Deutch) was proving to be an especially interesting character making identifiable decisions and mistakes contending with these contemporary interpersonal problems. However, this is also what’s wrong with the project. Though I liked and understood both of the women, I stopped believing Connor altogether. Though there’s nothing wrong or unattractive about a romantic-minded male love interest, he reacted exceptionally, but more alike to a romance book boyfriend instead of a flesh and blood man. He’s oh so patient and forgiving and merely hints at having his feeling hurt as the women’s fallout is given all of the complexity and grace. He’s exemplary and progressive and mature…and a caracature by the end, unbelievable and thus ultimately unattractive. The multi-person carnal enjoyment remains a happenstance, which I liked, but that’s really it. No one is particularly wiser, but merely as mature as they ever were and are expected to be. Sadly, in the end, I felt that all three could have done better. And there’s nothing sexy about that.

WATCH OR NOT: NOT